Angel's Reality: These are my words

Change For 2007??

Sun, 07 Jan 2007 15:30:15 GMT

Looking at my Messenger list and just at people in general, everyone has something about a new attitude in the new year. It sounds nice but when you look at it logically, how does a person suddenly change over?

There isn't much of a difference between 2006 and 2007. The same crappy insecurities that I had last year [last week actually] I still have today. I still fake happiness, I still question every move I make. Of course I continue to wonder why anyone would want a relationship with me...and of course that still makes every relationship difficult. [I won't even get into that one]

I mean if I went to sleep at the end of 2006 a depressed chick with no self-confidence or faith in myself, will I suddenly wake up content with myself in 2007? Perhaps the reason I haven't changed over is because I was wide awake when the clock moved us into a new year, therefore hampering the change.

If there is a person that had that transformation, I'd like to meet him or her and have a serious chat.

Saying "Changes in 2007" makes it seem like you bullshitted [and knew it] in 2006 but wanted to wait until 2007 to change things. Does this mean that a person has to wait for a new year to make him or herself a better person?

This is one of the reasons I don't make any ' New Year's Resolutions'. I try to make Resolutions everyday [whether or not I stick to them is a WHOLE other story] Everyday I wake up, I ask myself how can I be better than what I was yesterday..not "How can I be better than last year"

Instead of lamenting on it, I'm going to ask this question. Why make it seem like you need a new year to change? Why not try to better yourself everyday?

Take it from me, it isn't easy to change. The unknown is amazingly scary and unnerving but take a deep breath, take that leap of faith and hope that you make it thru safely.

I'm still mid-air and hoping that I make it down in one piece.

USF and The Pigeon

Wed, 03 Jan 2007 22:41:07 GMT

Subject: The Pigeon Has Delivered My Acceptance Package

Good day,

I've just received my I-20 and Acceptance letter, dated November 27, 2006, about two hours ago.
Seeing that it is close to impossible to go to the nearest Embassy, back home and then to Tampa by January 8th, five days from now, I'd like to formally request that my enrolment be pushed back to Fall 2007.

Perhaps the pigeon that delivered this package will be faster next time.

Kind Regards,
Makhicia Brooks

Soooo....what do you think? Nice isn't it!

I'm Sorry

Sun, 19 Nov 2006 14:26:02 GMT

I wrote something out of pure anger and pain last night. Those two emotions blinded my judgment when I wrote those words.

Last night was the first time I ever retracted anything I’ve ever written.

To the person that I un-intentionally hurt, I’m sorry. Hurting you was the last thing I ever wanted to do. I made the wrong choice last night and ended up hurting you in the process. I hid behind my writing because I was afraid to say the words out loud.

I really am sorry and do regret that.

An apology probably doesn’t make up for what I did, but it’s the best I can do right now.

Wise Words

Thu, 16 Nov 2006 05:33:20 GMT

Your favorite quotes with a Maki twist...

When one door closes, no others open...you're screwed.

When it rains, in floods...get yaself a life jacket.

When life hands you lemons...you gets lemons....I hope you like everything with a kick.

Only a fools trips on the same stone twice....I think you have dumbass written on your forehead.

People won't always like you...get yaself a gun for protection.

I want to kill myself...suicide is a mortal sin, a shitty life is better than hell...so suck it up.

Besides, what if you don't die and just end up physically screwed.

Life sucks.....change it or shut it.

I want to kill him/her....make sure you've covered all the bases, don't wanna wind up like the person.

________________________________________________________________

Note: I'll probably be updating this list as life inspires me to do so.

Hello...

Wed, 27 Sep 2006 03:16:15 GMT

Feel like I haven't been here in ages.

Probably because I haven't. There are a few reasons why people haven't seen a bright star next to my name.

For a while, I didn't have the ability to write. Finding the words felt like a burden rather than a release. There was so much inside me that I hadn't let out. Without writing I ended up crying. The anxiety of feeling like my world was crashing around me was more than I could handle. I wanted to run away but I couldn't just abandon the responsibilities that I had to everyone else. Which brought me to this question:

Is it my purpose in life to be the one that everyone relies on? The one that everyone goes to when their worlds crash? Normally these topics would make me feel good about myself, like I was actually using my life and time wisely, but lately it seems like a label I don't want.

Don't get me wrong, I love being the one that people trust, the one that makes other people's lives easier, however sometimes I don't feel like I'm being helped in return. Perhaps it's because I have yet to understand the concept of speaking openly to someone about what I feel. Perhaps it's that fear of letting others into the box that I've taken years to build to avoid repeating the pain that I've had to go thru over the years both physical and emotional. Sometimes I think that pain unfortunately is the best teacher of all; it's the reason that the best lessons are learnt thru pain.

Pain in itself isn't unbearable, it's the time after the pain that hurts the most. The time when you pick up the pieces and try to move seems like it will kill you. You struggle with the past, sigh thru the present and pray for a better future [if you want one at all]. The world has set a time limit on wallowing in your own pain, the rules are all unwritten but it's known. If you sprain your ankle you're allowed two days of sympathy, if you break a leg you're allowed to complain for a month or two before shutting up and adjusting, if someone broke your heart you should be able to smile within a year, if someone breaks your spirit you should be able to talk about it openly within two years.

Many of you may think I'm crazy or absurd for making such statements. Perhaps I am, who is to judge the sanity of each individual. But think back to when a friend was hurt, how long before you rolled your eyes when you heard them mention their pain? How often did you wish to tell them to suck it up or to shut up? Too often we want to force our own ideas of what people should be like on each other; sometimes unconsciously, sometimes knowing exactly what we're doing.

But is it okay to push such ideas? Are we doing it for the good of others or just so that we can sleep knowing that there is one less person that will irritate us tomorrow? Does attempting to change show that we want what's best for our loved-ones or does it show a blatant disrespect for the persons that they are? Are we being helpful or judgmental?

This is a strange but philosophical approach of my struggle these days. Everywhere I turn, I feel the pressure to be what others want me to be and between all these struggles I've lost sight of what I want to be. It's taken me almost two weeks to figure out something that has been bothering me for two years.

Now that I've seen the problem, I'm hoping to solve it, however I wonder what the time limit is to find yourself...

You and I

Wed, 13 Sep 2006 02:57:46 GMT

You called me

I called you

Neither Answered

You saw me

I saw you

Neither Looked

You spoke to me

I spoke to you

Neither Listened

You reached for me

I reached for you

Neither Held On

You were with me

I was with you

Never Together

You have Found

I have Lost

Not Each other, Another

You Sleep with happiness

I sleep with sadness

Knowing small bits of what tomorrow may bring

You've suddenly turned into a grand painting,

Never to be fooled with

Never to come close to.

Only there to burn a hole into my mind and heart.

And with this, I say Good Night,

Possibly Good Bye...

For self mutilation is no longer a hobby of mine.

____________________________________________________

Okay ladies and gents, this just came into my mind, I dunno why.

Looking at it now, I think my writing is getting back to normal.

My Name

Sun, 10 Sep 2006 02:37:59 GMT

M: Has fucking fun.

A: likes to drink.
K: Really silly.

H: Have a very good personality and looks good.

I: Has a fine ass

C: Is wild and crazy.
I: Has a fine ass

A: likes to drink.

B: like people.

R: Fuckin crazy

O: best in bed.

K: Really silly.

S: Easy to fall in love with.

A: likes to drink.
B: like people.
C: Is wild and crazy.
D: Has one of the best personalities ever.
E: a GOD DAMN GOOD KISSER
F: People adore you.
G: Never let people tell you what to do.
H: Have a very good personality and looks good.
I: Has a fine ass
J: Lives life for fun.
K: Really silly.
L: Loved by everyone
M: Has fucking fun.
N: Dead sexy.
O: best in bed.
P: Popular with all types of people.
Q: A hypocrite.
R: Fuckin crazy
S: Easy to fall in love with.
T: Loyal to those you love.
U: Really like to chill.
V: Not judgemental.
W: Very broad minded.
X: Never let people tell you what to do.
Y: one of the best damn bf/gf ne one could ask for.
Z: Always ready.

Personal Thoughts: I think this thingy was quite accurate. My favorite beverages happen to have alcohol, I've heard that I have a nice rear-end, I'm crazy and an ass, The Good in Bed part..weelll

10,010

Sat, 09 Sep 2006 13:57:07 GMT

I was gonna leave a crappy response to Mr. Cruxx for sayin that my proposal sucks, but ya aren't that important right now!!!

Dude!!!

My MSN Space and I have made it far 10,010 views!!

They love me...they really really do

I'd like to thank the following for making this possible:

Cruxx....who in the last few months has made me the center of his world, thinking about me hours on end, dreaming of me, wishing he had me and my coffee and cheesecake.

RFB.....my fav group of guys, always there to cheer me up or make me laugh my ass off. My last weeks at SDHS would have royaly sucked without you guys!! Even though one of ya'll made me cry!!! Still Love Ya! Team Spirit!!! Oh yeee...I want in on Next Summer!!

Reena...my weird, strange child. I don't even know what to say about you.

John...my former BIL...brother-in-law...always there to ask me who the heck the people in my life are. Ya know 'em all John...just think.

Darren...that philosophical voice in the back of my head.

All my stalkers...hate knowing that ya'll are here...but at least you come in handy.

Those websites that use my space as a free bilboard leaving all your trackbacks behind.

Those people that just click on my space for the heck of it.

All the little people that I've had to step on over the years......na na na na na...I rock, you suck!

_____________________________________________________________

Oh ye...still got some space for Cruxx.

Never got any complaints before....

Minor Detail

Thu, 07 Sep 2006 06:38:26 GMT

Ooppssssssssssiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

I seemed to have forgotten one minor [Major if your name is Percy..lol] detail in that perfect proposal of mine

The Ring!!

The guy has free reign on that.

Well....unless it looks like a three-tier cake and moves

LOL...Don't ask, they do make them like that, trust me.

Okay...I think It's Perfect Now.

I have properly informed my future husband..where ever he may be.

Lol...this is probably the part in the movie where the men in white coats come in and throw the sycko chick in a straight jacket.

The aliens are coming!!!!

Lmao....

Alrighty...crazy talk is over,

The C.I.A. is probably keeping an eye on me...so I'm gonna cut it short here.

Much Love,

-Maki

Instructions

Thu, 07 Sep 2006 06:26:29 GMT

Instructions to what you may ask...

Instruction on how to propose to me!!

Right now I'm in bed, drinking coffee, eating cheesecake and listening to Bone.

This is my mini-contentment.

Then it hit me...

I want to be proposed to around 2 AM, I want cheesecake, White Roses and Bone in the background, if he can incoperate coffee into the mix as well, it's a sure yes.

I know, I sound crazy, but it was a pretty picture in my head...

If only the guy in my head had a face....

Anywhoo...

I'm outtie again!

Logmein.com

Tue, 25 Jul 2006 02:59:26 GMT

Okay...

Another Program that NEEDS to be mentioned.

Need serious real-time remote access to another PC?

http://www.logmein.com is for you!!

Hit up the site, register and just follow the directions.

Then you're on your way to a lil piece of Heaven!!

Fashion Show...by Meeeee

Mon, 19 Jun 2006 16:02:40 GMT

Alrighty...

Went to a "Fashion Show" yesterday, over Le Galion.

After what I saw, I have come to the conclusion that I need to hold a "Fashion Show."

Why you may ask...

Cause the "Fashion Shows" that these idiots are organizing are GHETTO as hell

Folks that were there yesterday know what I'm talkin about.

Damn..anybody that been to a "Fashion Show" on Da Rock knows what I'm talkin about.

Sooooo...

To prevent futher eye damage, I think I should save us all.

OKay...this sorta sounds like a joke, but I'm actually considerin it for real.

Rule number 1:

No Ghetto girls with no shame!!

Example: Some chick that went up there and attempted to entertain every straight male on the beach

Maar ja...

Maybe I could do it and pull it off. It could be my gift to this Rock.

Lemme know what ya think.

Ciao...

New Quote

Mon, 22 May 2006 19:37:41 GMT

"My life isn't perfect but every now and then I am given things to smile about. It is those few things that keep me going" -Makhicia Brooks

I hope that's an original Angel Production

Dark Words

Fri, 19 May 2006 01:37:54 GMT

I let my mind go to places I had locked away.

Places that I had closed my mind and heart off to.

No entry.

Until today.

The locks have been broken, the door is wide open.

I can't close it as all the memories, regrets, sorrow and cold nights come back freshly as if it all happened yesterday.

The pain of years ago feels like it was endured hours ago.

There is this pain in my heart, not quite physical, but it is there.

When I think of certain people or certain things, I feel this strange pain as if something in me has fallen.

I wonder if in the future there will be anything left to fall.

I feel empty inside. I don't know how I'm supposed to fill this gap that was never to be re-opened. I don't have months or years to hope that it closes.

I know not what lies ahead, but I know what lies inside.

Inside is a person that is lost and hurt.

Carnival!!!

Wed, 19 Apr 2006 15:03:52 GMT

So I didn't venture out to the wonderful world of SDHS. Woke up, told my rents I wasn't going to school, went back to bed til about 9:30.

Carnival officially kicks off tonight at 8 PM at Raoul Illidge Sports Complex.

As much as I feel kinda beaten up right now...I'm really really excited!!

I dunno why, but I'm kinda nervous about something. Not completely sure about what it is but I have this strange feeling things are gonna get interesting this carnival.

Oh ye for more carnival info check out the website >> > >Carnival Website <<<<

Tot Straks folks...and have a great Carnival 2006!!!

Gay Bashing on Da Rock

Sun, 16 Apr 2006 14:18:02 GMT

OKay...I've been trying really hard to keep away from this subject.

However...I can't be avoided anymore.

This whole "Gay Bashing" thing is getting out of control. If St. Maarten doesn't watch out, it's gonna end up being the next Aruba!!!

If you haven't heard as yet, these two gay men were beaten [one half to death] by a group of men while chillin at one of my favorite places on Da Rock. However, before they could safely leave, they were attacked.

The following is a link to a list of threads collected so far about the whole thing so far >>> Gay Bashing Theards <<<

OKay..so hopefully you're been through the threads here's a quick overview:

"The story so far, as we understand it.

The two guys who were severely beaten were meeting with two other guys at Bamboo Bernies on Wednesday night, (Ladies Night) where they sat having drinks and probably having a great time. Except for the group nearby who didn't like seeing guys cuddling and kissing, words and threats were exchanged which ended when the homophobic group were asked to leave by management. The CBS guys and their friends left about half an hour later, about 2.30-3.00am, apparently not accepting or feeling they needed BB's offer of an escort or perhaps a taxi.

It would seem one pair were slightly ahead of the other, and as they passed by Sunset Beach Bar a car sped up, attempting to maybe hit one of the pairs of men and perhaps even did. Then approximately 4 guys and 2 women jumped out of the car and at least one of these people starting laying to with a wheel wrench/tire iron. The other pair of men ran up, and it seems they were attacked too.

I asked at Sunset today about the incident, I was told that the place was most likely closed at the time and I would have to come back and ask the night watchman/guard what he saw. I have not therefore been able to verify who called the police. Perhaps Jimmy from BB who is reading these pages can let us know more. Have the police been by to take statements or interview witnesses to the friction in the bar before the assault? To get descriptions maybe?

The Police claim that they did turn up but it was after the ambulance had left. They also seem to claim they tried to talk to the men at the hospital but were unable to. Yet the assaulted men state that as of 1.00pm they had yet to see a policeman or had been able to give a statement. They were flown to the States that same afternoon." -Thanks to Dr. Voodoo of St. Maarten Private Eye"

Anywho...I don't want to seem cold hearted or anything like that...BUT there are a number of sites and people that are making it seem like gay bashing only happens on St. Maarten [and the Caribbean in general for that matter] when it isn't like that. I feel sorry for the guys, really I do cuz I wouldn't want it to happen to any of my friends. But there are alot of people that aren't that cool with homosexuals. A great part of the US population isn't comfortable with homosexuality and some of them go far lengths to "stop it."

Most St. Maarteners aren't homophobic...there are too many homosexual people on St. Maarten to really be homophobic. However, while SXMers aren't homophobic, they aren't exactly "comfortable" with seeing people of the same sex be intimate. It even kinda freaks me out sometimes [all honesty] but I'm too calm to jump them because of it. Unfortunately there are some people who do get uncomfortable enough to attack.

All in all...I don't want St. Maarten to be the next Aruba where people are making it seem like terrible things only happen in the Caribbean. Check your own back yards to see what's going on.

And yes, the Dutch legal system is complicated..don't blame us..it was forced unto us. If you wanna blame someone...BLAME THE QUEEN!!

Me updated

Sat, 25 Feb 2006 06:35:32 GMT

Starting time: 12:30 am..

1)Full name: Makhicia J. Brooks

1b)Who named you?: Mom probably

1c)Were you named after anyone?: not a damn soul

1d)Nickname(s): Angel, Maki, Khicia, Sunshine

2)School: St. Dominic High School

3)Date of birth: May 4th 1989 [don't tell the people at Sunset Beach Bar or Bliss please!!]

3b)Where were you born?: Da Rock, aka St. Maarten

4)Email: about 12 shots of Tequila and I'll tell you

5)Color eyes: brown
6)Height: 5'8"

7)Siblings?: 2 Bros n a Sis

8)Piercing’s, Tattoo’s?: Yeah

9)Ever been kissed?: Yeah

10)Ever missed school because it was raining?: Duh

11)Ever faked sick?: Nah

12)Kept a secret from everyone?: Duh

12b)Have you ever told a secret you swore not to tell?: Hmmm... I dunno

13)Had an imaginary friend?: Yeah...still do

14)Wanted to hook up with a friend?: Yup...no, not you Rae

15)Who is your "star crush"?: I don't do the 'crush' thing

16)Ever thought of animated characters as hot?: Me...cartoons?!?!

17)Do you wish on stars?: Yeah jed, things rough

18)When did you last cry?: two days ago

19)Do you like your handwriting?: Yup

20)What is your most embarrassing moment?: I dunno, my problems aren't physical

21)What is your most embarrassing CD?: Don't have any..proud of my music

22)If you were another person, would you be friends with yourself?: Doubt it

23)Do looks matter?: Not really.. personality is number one

24)How do you release anger?: Writing, listening to music, taking a shower

25)Where is your second home?: Either SDHS or Town

26)Do you trust others too easily?: Me...trust people..lol

27)What class in high school do you think is totally useless?: 1st form

28)Do you have a journal?: Yup

29)Do you use sarcasm a lot?: No shit sherlock

30)Would you bungee jump?: Can't wait to do it

31)Do you unite your shoes when you take them off?: What kind of crap is that?

32)Do you think that you are strong?: Depends on who you ask, but I think I am... sorta, kinda

33)What size of shoe do you wear?: 10..shut up

34)What is your least favorite thing about yourself?:inability to say no to people

35)Who do you miss most?: Raaaeeee

36)Do you want everyone you send this to send it back?: They can't!

37)What color pants are you wearing?: Kinda reddish color

38)What are you listening to right now?: Citizen Cope

39)What was the last thing you ate?: Subway

40)If you were a crayon, what color would you be?: Blue.. duh

41)What is the weather like right now?: Just perfect

42)Last person you talked to on the phone?: Amy

43)The first thing you notice about the opposite sex?: Eyes.. doesn't really matter about the color, just the expression hidden in them

44)The first thing you notice about the same sex?: The way they walk

45)Do you like the person who sent you this to you?: Yeah, I like Jordie

46)Do you wear contacts?: Nope, gave up on my vision

47)Who is most likely to respond?: No one

48)Who is least likely to respond?: No one

49)Where would you want to go on your next vacation?: Boston

50)What’s on your mouse pad?: TelNet junk

51)Where was the farthest you have been from home?: Holland.. miss my Honey Bunches of Oats

52)Did you shower today?: Yup, another when I'm one with this

53)What is right next to you?: A window

54)What was the last thing you did?: Sleep.. back to it after the shower

55)Where would you want to go on your honeymoon?: Amsterdam

56)How’s the weather?: Perfect

57)What did you do last night?: Sorry, really crappy memory

58)Most attractive thing about the Opposite sex?: How they look when they're doing nothing, just relaxed

59)How do you eat an Oreo?: I dunno, haven't had one in months

60)Dream vehicle?: Haven't given it much thought

61)What you want to be when your older?: Content

62)What do you love about your birthday?: Not a freaking thing

63)If you could change your name what would it be?: Alexandria

64)Do you sleep with a stuffed animal?: Only when I'm crying

65)Most stupidest thing you have ever done?: I'm sensible...hehehe

66)First son’s name?: Alexander

67)First daughter’s name?: Hope or Faith

68)If you could change something about yourself?: Wish I could just open up to people

69)Do you have any pets?: Not any more

69b)What kind of pets and names of pets?:Quit with the animal q's

70)Who send you this survey?: Jordan

71)Anything you want to say to everyone?: Just because you love someone doesn't mean they will love you in return

72)Dress up on Halloween?: No

73)Like to travel?: Yeah

74)Want to get married?: Still debating it

75)Are you a good student?: Yeah, but I've heard that I'm lazy...I dunno why

76)Are you currently happy?: Joke right?

77)Have you ever cheated on somebody?: Ummm, kinda

78)Do long distance relationships work?: Only in special cases

79)Do you believe in farts?: OKay...next question please

80)Believe in love at first sight?: No...

81)Do you consider yourself the life of the party?: Nah, not my style

82)Do you drink?: Yup

83)Do you make fun of people?: Sometimes...I suck I know

84)Do you think dreams eventually come true?: Ask me in about ten years

85)Go to the movies or rent?: Both

86)Have you ever moved?: No, but I will soon..**sigh**

87)Have you ever stolen anything?: No, don't have it in me

87b)If so, What? Are you deaf...I can't steal!!

88)Last time you cut your hair?: Yesterday

89)Last person you talked to on the phone?:Amy

90)Your current job?: Put up with the world

91)What you thinking of right now?: Wondering if the people in my life will always be there

92)Most recent thing you’re looking forward too?: Getting out of SDHS

93)Pick a lyric, any lyric or song?: "How much longer will it take to cure this" -Counting Crows

94)Ever been drunk?: Nope... still waiting

95)What’s your worst fear?: Being alone

96)Do you chew on your straws?: Yup

97)Were you a cute baby?: I would hope so

98)What color is your keyboard?: Grey

99)Sing in the shower?: Yup

100)Sky diving for you?: Possibly

101)Have you eaten sushi?: Yeah, I'll stick to Subway though

102)What are you allergic to?: Dust...really bad sometimes

103)Do you cry at weddings?: No

104)How do you like your eggs?: Not really an egg fan, but scrambled

105)Santa clause real?: No

106)Do you like to have your neck kissed?: Yup...niceee

107)Afraid of the dark?: Depends on where I am

108)What are you addicted too?: Music, Books and Subway

109)Can you crack your neck?: Yup

110)Have you ever ridden in an ambulance?: Nah

111)Is drug free the way to be?: Not sure, but weed if you're gonna do drugs. Anything else and we're through

112)Play any instruments?: Me?!?!

113)Can you snow board?: Haven't tried it yet

114)Do you like camping?: Yup, then again..depends on who you're going with

115)Believe in magic?: Me!?!?!

116)Dog’s mens best friend?: I dunno

117)Can you do the moonwalk?: Nah

118)Do you wear nail polish?: Hahahahahahaha

119)What’s the most annoying tv commercial?: Not big on the tv thing

120)Are your parents married or divorced?: Married

121)Vegetarian?: Not anymore..considering going back

122)Come close to dying?: Yeah..don't ask

123)Do you eat the stems of broccoli?: Yup..love most veggies

124)Wear Make-up?: Only when the moon is blue

125)Would you ever have plastic surgery? Nah.. unless it was a life and death situation

126)What do you wear in bed?: Boxers and a bra [shirt if I'm cold]

127)Have you ever done anything illegal?: Depends on what you consider illegal

128)Can you roll your tongue?: Never tried

129)Believe in abortion?: Still debating it

130)Who was the last person you touched?: Lissandro

131)Have you loved someone so much it makes you cry?: Yeah, damn you people

132)Would you ever go out dressed like the opposite sex?: Yup, did it most of my life

133)Ever been involved with the police?: No.. told ya, I'm responsible

134)Do you talk in your sleep?: When stressed, yes

135)Can you cross your eyes?: Yup

136)Ever met someone famous?: Yup

137)Do you twirl your spaghetti or cut it?: Twirly

138)How long does your shower last?: 15 minutes normally, might go to 30 depending on the mood

139)When was your first crush?: 3rd grade, remember it sooo well, first and last 'crush'

140)Where do you wish you were?: In town, sitting on my bench [one opposite the Catholic church by Little Switzerland] with a good book, a cappuccino and cheese cake both from Kangaroo Court.

141)Have you ever broken someone’s heart?: Don't think so

142)Last gift you received?: White rose

143)Last sport you played/did?: Football [Soccer]

144)Last wedding you attended?: Not a fan of weddings

145)Can you cook?: Yeah, doesn't mean I like to

146)Most hated food?: Soup, steak and fish [unless its fried]

147)Last concert attended?: I dunno... a Summerfest show I think

148)What do you need?: My sanity, contentment and maybe a male

149)Keep a diary?: I prefer to call it a Journal

150)Ever go scubadiving?: Nah, I like being above water

151)What you doing now?: Thinking about someone, listening to music, thinking of what to eat and doing this [yes I can multi-task well]

152)What do you eat most of the time?: Subway duh!

153)Whats the one thing you’d like to change in your life?: I'd like some people out of my life

154)Drove a car before?: Yeah

155)Drove anything else?: Quad.. shhh, don't tell Daddy

156)Like country music?: Yup

157)Ever jump off a cliff?: Yup, got a scar to remember my last jump

158)What’s the craziest thing you’ve done?: Walk past some classrooms in just boxers and a bra...don't dare me people

159)Ever been arrested?: Responsible remember! Plus I'm cool with too many officers

160)Regret anything?: What don't I regret??

-----------Witch one?-----------

1)Sleep with or without clothes on?: On mostly

2)Prefer black or blue pens?: Blue

3)Christmas or halloween?: Christmas

4)Colored or black-and-white photo?: Black and White

5)Loud or soft music?: Depends on the music

6)Mc.Donalds or Burgerking?: Why isn't Subway an option?!!? **Sigh** Burger King

7)Night or day?: Night

8)Piano or guitar?: Paino

9)Gold or silver?: Silver

10)Beach or pool?: Pool...hate sand

11)Hamburger or hot dog?: Again why isn't Subway an option?!?! **Sigh** Hamburger in that case [I feel the hate towards Subway]

12)Window seat or aisle?: Window

13)On the phone or in person?: In person, not a big fan of the phone [only feels right with certain people]

14)Coffee or Cappicino?: Cappuccino...seriously need to hit up Kangaroo

15)Biologie or history?: Me and a science?!?! Hahahahahaha

16)Boat or car?: Boat

17)Hot or cold?: Cold

18)Bungee jump or Sky dive?: Bungee Jump

19)Water or lemonade?: Water

20)Hat or no hat?: Depends [Yankees Only]

21)Nike or Jordan?: Nike

22)Can food or microwave food?: Microwave [unless its tuna]

23)Hugs or Kisses?: Both please

------------Favorites------------

1)Fav. Food?: Crab sandwich OR wrap [spinach] from Subway or a seafood pasta

2)Fav. Drink?: Water, White Zin, Sprite, Ginger Ale

3)Fav. Alcoholic drink?: Vodka on ice, or Amaretto Sprite if I'm keeping it light

4)Fav. Color?: Blue duh!

5)Fav. Place in the world?: N.Y. or Amsterdam..where will I go?!?

6)Fav. Animal?: Dolphins

7)Fav. Shoe brand?: Like I give a crap

8)Fav. Clothing?: Probably Puma

9)Fav. Restaurant?: Subway, Kangaroo Court, Talula, Cappuccino Diner or where ever my bro is cooking

10)Fav. Airline?: Air France

11)Fav. Cartoon character?: Hahahahahaha

12)Fav. Movie?: A Bronx Tale!!

13)Fav. Singer?: Is Em a singer?

14)Fav. Song?: I won't even try to answer

15)Fav. Hairstyle?: Like I really give a crap

16)Fav. Acter/Actress?: I dunno

17)Fav. Icecream?: Forgot the name, its from Haagen Dazs, something with chocolate, fudge and vanilla

18)Fav. Sport?: Baseball, Football [America], Basketball, Football [Soccer]

19)Fav. Instrument?: Like hearing the piano

20)Fav. Book?: Wayyy too many..anything by Nicholas Spark, Dan Brown, James Patterson. Nora Roberts...ohhh the list can go on!!

Aqua Teen Hunger Force....ewwwww

Sat, 25 Feb 2006 00:04:34 GMT

OKay, at first it was only Cruxx, but now it seems like Kalin does it too!!!!

These two jokers actually watch and enjoy Aqua Teen Hunger Force.... a cartoon!!

Now, I have never commented on people's preferences [not even cartoons and video games]

However, Aqua Teen Hunger Force is by far one of the dumbest things I have ever come across!!!

Currently talking to Kalin and he's telling me that the only reason I don't like it is because I don't have a sense of humor.

My reply "I do but the show just doesn't make any sense"

His reply "That's why it's so funny"

Please tell me there aren't other people in the world that enjoys 'ATHF', I mean Adult Swim isn't completely bad [Robot Chicken isn't that bad], but damn they went wrong with almost everything else.

Oh well, and they wonder why I hate cartoons with a passion

Final thoughts..."eewwwwwwww"

Take that Cruxx and Kalin!!!

Nothing to say

Wed, 22 Feb 2006 22:43:05 GMT

This is what came of second period English... [not a class assignment]

I hear your voice.

I see your face,

But we aren't sharing the same space.

Going on is hard.

Without you here,

I don't really care.

No tears shed.

The days are long,

Wish I didn't have to be this strong.

Where are you.

I can't see you,

I can't feel you.

I couldn't stand on my own.

You were once my crutch,

Didn't think I needed you so much.

The longing is hard to bear.

I want this pain to end,

I want to see you around the bend.

I'm losing the battle.

Maybe this was a test,

Now we all see I'm not the best.

Nothing left for me.

Maybe I should walk way,

Would be best since I have nothing to say.

Yet Another Angel Production

________________________________________________

Feel like me again after that one.

Please note that this isn't about anyone in particular [or is it]

I'm sorry

Sun, 05 Feb 2006 16:17:59 GMT

Sometime in 1988 I came into your lives.

On May 4th 1989, I ruined your lives.

I'm sorry for both.

I'm the one thing that brings you together.

I'm the one thing that tears you apart.

Maybe your greatest joy.

Surely your greatest regret.

May have been happy without me.

Surely unhappy with me.

Ruined both your lives,

I get it, I'm sorry.

'Tapped in the Closet' by R. Kelly

Sun, 22 Jan 2006 00:00:17 GMT

Yooo folks...I just wanna say that R. Kelly is a freakin GENIUS!!

Just finished watching Tapped in the Closet chapters 1 to 12

I don't even have the words to describe!

That is the best 40 minute movie I have ever seen!!!

The words 'insane', 'siickk', 'outta control', 'messed up', 'krazy as hell' and 'DAMN' all come to mind!

WWHHHOIIIIIIIII

Whoiiiii

Wed, 18 Jan 2006 17:46:36 GMT

Boyyy,

Little by little, the people around me starting to seem less and less ummmm 'Likeable'

Everyday I learn something new about somebody that just making me go 'UUUGGGGGHHHHH' everytime I see them.

Meen even know what else to say jed.

So to Christian, Dinesh n Kennedy, all I goin say is WHOOOOIIIIIII....LMAOOOO

Oh ye n Christian...das alot of skill you got there buddae..use it wisely.

P.S. Cuz of allu three, I can't look at dem two da same..[well already had an opinion of one, ya'll just made it worse]

My Arab Princess

Tue, 17 Jan 2006 23:49:02 GMT

**SIGH**

We curse and we fight [God knows how many times]

We ignore eachother

We wanna kill eachother

Sometimes I want to drop you on your lil Arab ass

But you're still my Arab Princess.

I Love You Amy!!!

You know why....especially after what you told me...I Love you even more.

Be Safe...